Kids Say the Darndest Things
Mom: whenever I hear your “moo” I smile ‘cause I know you’re ok…
Son: kk awww that’s nice.
Mom: it’s 3AM there - what? can't sleep?
Son: I’m just off guard
Son: someone tried to blow our FOB up
Son: but I’m off guard right now
Son: vehicle borne IED
Son: we were finding body parts in our MOTORPOOL
Son: inside the FOB we were finding body parts
Mom: ok.. had they already been blown up? Or the body parts were part of the IED?
Son: yes after the explosion
Mom: killed our guys?????
Mom: tg [thank God]
Son: only IA [Iraq Army]
Mom: too bad there
Son: then the IA got scared and started shooting civis and then at us, so we returned fire at the IA
Mom: oh man... bad bad bad
Son: eh its ok
Mom: when was this... day or night?
Son: day at 830 our time
Mom: were you doing the shooting or some other plt? [platoon]
Son: ppl [people] on guard
Son: I don’t think 500 plus ppl are going to start shooting at once in all diff directions
Mom: no, I didn't mean you'd all just pick up yr guns & shoot, just meant were you /v/r/m there
Son: yeah we were there, but we weren’t shooting
Mom: do they know how the vehicle got in? or was it at a gate?
Son: it was at the CP [check point] right outside our gate
Mom: glad they didn't get IN... how many IA killed?
Son: 3, 10 wounded plus they shot another dozen or so
Mom: f*kkk what is wrong with those people? can't figure out what they think they (AIF) [anti-Iraqi Forces] accomplish? It w/ just make me (and hopefully the rest of the Iraqis) pissed and fight back harder...
Son: wow don’t make a big deal out of it, it happens every day here
Mom: still w/ piss me off... doesn't make it more palatable/acceptable and I would never get used to it
Son: yes, ok. But it just is the way it is here for the time being. We can’t take it personal or we w/n be able to do our jobs.
Mom: understand. Just can’t imagine what that m/b like for you guys… and the Iraqis. The world should know that the AIF are evil evil evil.
Mom: of course there has been nothing on the news... and nothing in the DOD press releases either
Son: well it just happened today
Son: give it a day or so
Mom: gtg [got to go]... love you son... be safe ... stay alert... mwahs... x0x0x0x0x0x mom
Son: I will. don’t you worry
Mom: impossible... when you love someone, you worry.. you c/b in paramus and we'd still worry ;-)
Son: lol [laugh out loud]
Mom: come to think of it, the traffic in paramus was probably good training for driving in baqubah :-P
Son: lmao [laughing my ass off]
Mom: ttyl [talk to you later] mwahs my son! Here’s Dad…
Dad: Hey Son - it's Dad
Son: Hi pops!
Dad: At 2300 tonight I'm going to the casino to take lessons in Texas hold-em poker.
Son: win me some money
Dad: you bet. If I play roulette, what's your favorite number between 0-36?
Son: let’s see… 11
Son: it was my number in baseball most of the time
Dad: yeah, I remember. ok, I'll put a couple bucks on 11 when I feel the karma is right!
Dad: that'll be somewhere around 1100 today, your time - so keep your fingers crossed then.
Son: I will
Dad: happy St. Patrick's Day. are they serving up any green beer at the mess hall?
Son: just no alcoholic beer
Dad: Luv 'ya, man. Anything special you want me to send you?
Son: I’m good…. Lots of stuff from you guys and Aunt M and Aunt K and my buds... very generous. love in every box! lol
Dad: ok...speak to ya later. Love you. I'm VERY proud of you, son.
Son: love you too, dad
Anyway, I sometimes just can’t believe I’m having these conversations with my son. Shouldn’t we be talking about cars? Girls? (Well, to be honest, we talk about those things, too.) I can’t believe how many times I told my kids not to swear – and now I’m almost as bad as them – but if you could hear the way soldiers talk – every third word is a curse and it’s so ingrained they don’t even know they’re doing it – or they end with a quick “Sorry, Ma.” The part about Paramus is a reference to New Jersey... near where we used to live and where our kids grew up and learned to drive. -- the worst traffic in the world -- an LA traffic jam at 55 mph! When our son went to Airborne School, we used to joke that six months before we wouldn't let him drive in Paramus because we thought that was dangerous -- and now he was jumping out of planes! And now...
The conversation with his Dad was pretty amusing and brought big smiles. Since our son deployed at age 19 but will be 21 by the time he returns (and he’s the only one of our children that was not old enough to drink or go to the casino before he left for Iraq), we told him that when he gets back, he can register to vote on the way to the casino to have a drink – so it has a special meaning between the guys!!
This incident has not yet been reported on the news… but I’ll be watching to see how close the details are and whether there’s a spin to it. If it ever makes it to the news (see last post). And maybe by morning my heart rate will have slowed. Maybe.