color: SOME SOLDIER'S MOM: Nightmares

Friday, September 09, 2005

Nightmares

Funny how the mind works... In the more than eight months Noah was in Iraq, I rarely had nightmares. Oh, I had worries, for sure and sometimes my fear and worry kept me awake at night, especially on those occasions when we would hear nothing from the Guys for extended periods. But I don't remember dreaming bad dreams or having nightmares about the Guys.
Since Noah was injured though, I have had more nonsensical nightmares that involved all things military which awaken me and leave those feelings of anxiety that linger for some time after. For instance, last night I had two different nightmares. In the first, everyone was running inside the seats and recesses of a large stadium (I swear it was the Meadowlands in Jersey). People were running and there were soldiers with guns protecting us as we all ran. I have no clue what or whom they were shooting at or protecting us from, but they were protecting us. None of the soldiers were known to me, but they were definitely the Good Guys.
In the second dream there were people in a large office building with lots of doors and rooms and hallways and my DH and I were trying to help an older man who needed to have someone on a stretcher moved down a few flights of stairs... but when we arrived, there were lots of people helping. Again, there were military people around and there was some urgency to the situation... and fear. I remember having fearful dreams while we were in Germany, too although I can not remember any of the details -- just that when I woke, my heart was beating fast and I was anxious.
I'd suspect that these might be subliminal references to the Hurricane Katrina recovery efforts, but I'm getting my information from print and online sources since television coverage is no longer factual but instead hysterical... And somehow I know these dreams are just all the worry and stress and anguish of the last 18 days bubbling over from those places in our heads that we tuck all those feelings when they would otherwise overwhelm our sanity... and then we have to let them out in small pieces so that they disperse... Yes, funny how the mind works.
And so today I'm going to repair a little... getting my hair cut... maybe ride a horse in the hills... take my dogs for a long walk in the woods and let them chase butterflies and tiny lightning fast ground lizards (which they actually think they can catch - HA!)... and then I'm taking a few days off... off to help a certain soldier get settled into new housing... and we're going to go get his "stuff"... a television, a radio, blankets and pillow... taking him civilian clothing... and a Class A uniform hung so precisely in a closet nine months ago that will be updated with new rank and a Combat Infantry Badge awarded yesterday so that he can wear it to the memorial service next week for a fallen comrade and friend... and when I return, I plan to stay home for a while...
Copyright 2005. All rights reserved.

7 Comments:

At 9/09/2005 9:22 AM , Blogger Stacy said...

I am so sorry that you are having all the nightmares. Sure wish I could wave a little stick and make them go away. Hopefully in time they will.

Please let me know if there is anything I can do. Will be so glad to help. Let me know when you are headed this way.

Enjoy that walk in the woods and the ride on the horse.

Try to have a good weekend. Holler if you need anything at all.

 
At 9/09/2005 10:10 AM , Blogger Kat said...

Ditto to the above... so sorry you are going thru this, tho I'm quite positive it is a normal and natural reaction, which over time should hopefully subside. {{{{big huge hugs}}}}

It's funny you should mention nightmares... I was gonna post on my blog (but haven't yet) that for the past two nights, I've had nightmares, too ~ a collage of floods and protests (and COUNTER-protests that I participated in, in my dream)and soldiers and being shot (myself)...

freaky. Anyway, love ya much, will keep on praying for you!

 
At 9/09/2005 11:38 AM , Blogger AlliCadem said...

SSM~
I've been lurking you site for so long, never knowing what to say.

Your family is in my thoughts, and I read your blog daily (even if I have already read it)....

I just wanted you to know that there's a lot of us out here who care about you....

 
At 9/09/2005 5:59 PM , Blogger Call Me Grandma said...

Only you know how too say it. That was one great post. You capture your feelings so well.
If you need anything let me know. I am always here for you.
Do mothers have post traumatic syndrome?
I am praying for us all.

 
At 9/09/2005 6:13 PM , Anonymous Andi said...

I hope the nightmares subside. I'm sure a long walk with the dogs and a ride on a horse did wonders for you. Nature and animals have a way of leveling us all out.

Take care of Noah down south - and take care of yourself while you're at it.

 
At 9/09/2005 8:40 PM , Blogger Army Wife said...

drink some chamomille, with honey, and do NOT watch the news for a couple of days...if you can stand it....a ride on the horse, that sounds good.....

 
At 9/10/2005 4:12 AM , Anonymous Mrs G said...

I too hope your dreams subside soon and turn into meaningless dreams like being naked in the grocery store. Enjoy that long walk with your dogs, I'll be thinking of you as I'm walking mine. Now just a little suggestion, that may sound silly but when riding that horse wear a helmet. I'm sure you remember why I'm suggesting this.

Big hugs to you from Deutschland and be sure to pass one on to Noah and that hubby of yours.

Keeping Matt's family in our prayers.

miss you

 

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